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- Synchronicity Now
Hey there
In this week’s edition:
Why we miss what’s around us
Seeing through old wounds
What changes as we heal
Those strange coincidences
“Miracles happen every day, change your perception of what a miracle is and you'll see them all around you.”
For much of my life, I was pretty focused on what could go wrong.
I could walk into a situation and quickly find the potential problem.
I thought I was being smart and prepared.
A lot of it was fear.
When we’ve accumulated enough painful experiences, we learn to anticipate more of them.
After doing a lot of inner work, I started noticing things I had missed before.
People showed up.
Opportunities appeared.
Sometimes the timing seemed magical.
It’s called sychncronicity, and it only happens when we clear out the old fear-based garbage.
Why we miss what’s around us
Joseph Campbell suggested that doors of opportunity open when we follow our bliss.
Jung used the word synchronicity for meaningful coincidences that seem to have some connection beyond ordinary cause and effect.
Nice concepts.
They’re also difficult to experience when we’re carrying a belly full of unresolved emotion.
Most of us had painful experiences when we were young that we weren’t able to fully express.
Even loving caregivers had their own histories, fears, and limitations.
They couldn’t always make room for our anger, grief, fear, or creativity.
So we learned to pack parts of ourselves away.
Then we built a life around what remained.
Seeing through old wounds
We see the world through everything that has happened to us.
If we’ve been abandoned, we look for signs that someone is leaving.
If we’ve been humiliated, we watch carefully for criticism.
If our childhood was chaotic, we may spend enormous amounts of energy trying to predict what will happen next.
We are not afraid of the future. We’re afraid of the past repeating itself.
That old fear can consume a lot of the present moment.
We miss connections with others.
We miss opportunities.
We miss our own instincts because we’re busy watching for the next problem.
What changes as we heal
Inner work gradually changes what we notice.
We unpack some of the old painful stuff.
We let the anger come forward.
We grieve.
We talk honestly with people who understand this kind of work.
The nervous system begins to settle.
Our practiced patterns loosen.
We start doing things we might have previously dismissed.
We call someone.
Take a risk.
Go somewhere new.
Follow an idea that makes very little intellectual sense but somehow feels right.
And suddenly there is more life around us.
Those strange coincidences
Jung described synchronicity as a meaningful coincidence.
Most of us have experienced something like it.
You think about someone you haven’t seen in ten years and they call.
You reluctantly go somewhere and meet exactly the person you needed to meet.
An opportunity appears at a strangely appropriate time.
As I’ve done more healing, I’ve noticed more of these experiences.
Maybe they were happening all along.
I was pretty busy looking for trouble.
What are your experiences with synchronicity? Just hit reply…love to hear from you.
Also, I have a warm online community where we heal together daily. Click here to find out more about The Inner Work Community.
Watchin’ for the magic,
Bob
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The Monthly Roundup!
The forum for your voice on healing.
Timely desperation and the hunger for authenticity that follows. Avoidance of avoidance. Freedom through vulnerability. The water’s warm! Great article
Timely email, Bob, Thanks. I remember the Serenity Prayer from my days in recovery when I was really struggling which is daily these last three months.
As a former abused child, turned machine gunner, turned business analyst, this is gold…absolutely pure gold. Spot on. Possibly my favorite article so far.
There’s a song that captures this topic beautifully; “Standing in the Rain” by The Paper Kites
Fascinating read. I've always referred to fear as anxiety and never considered that I never wanted to admit that I felt scared. If we use the word 'anxiety', it's almost like saying 'Hey! It's clinical so you can't make fun of it!' which is why we resort to it, because we don't want to be made fun of for our fear. That's been my experience at least.
This is spot on! So needed this today! Thank you!!
Fear is so funny sometimes. I felt less fear getting into gunfights with the Taliban (because a large chunk of my fate was literally in my hands, a well-oiled and prepared M240B) versus coming back from overseas and riding a rollercoaster.
On the flipside, we have the idea of “courage”. I think in a list of your top fears, let’s say AVOID your #1 fear, and double-down on your #9 fear. The result would be praise from all people who have your #9 on your list, listed as their #1 (maybe fear of death for us soldier types).
Excellent article as always! This is a favorite for sure. Thanks Doctor.
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